Children's Story: Jesus and the storm

A long time ago, Jesus was traveling by boat with the apostles from one city to another.  And Jesus was very tired so he went downstairs, what they call below deck on a boat, and he went to sleep.

While Jesus was asleep a big storm came.  There was a lot of wind, and a lot of rain.  There was a lot of lightening and a lot of thunder.  And there were big waves.  The waves were bigger than the boat.  And everybody on the boat thought that they were going to die.  Except for Jesus because he was asleep. 

Then one of the apostles, I think it was Peter, went and woke Jesus up saying, "Jesus, How can you sleep we are going to die!"  And Jesus got up, went upstairs, and told the storm to stop.  And the wind stopped.  And the rain stopped.  And the lightening stopped.  And the thunder stopped.  And waves stopped crashing over the side of the boat.  And everybody on the boat knew it was going to be okay.  They knew that they were going to live.  And Jesus went back downstairs and went back to sleep because he was still very tired.


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I want to make a few comments about this.  I know there are a few discrepancies from the Biblical account.  Namely,
1) In the Bible Christ in the "hinder part of the ship" (Mark 4), which I take to mean aft of the boat not below deck.
2) There is no mention of rain, thunder, or lightening in the Bible, only wind and waves.
3) The biblical account says disciples, which I think is generally understood to mean Apostles in this context, but it definitely names no names about who woke Jesus up.

There are a few features about this that I really like.
1)  It focuses a lot on sleep and how people need it.  Good bedtime story.  It is usually my finale.
2)  It has two features in particular that indicate it is a real and not make believe story. 
    a) It starts out with the chronological reference, "A long time ago"
    b) The phrase, "I think it was Peter" indicates there are real facts you could get wrong.
3)  The list of elements of the storm get repeated twice.  Most of the time we hear songs and stories that use quantities (Three bears, three pigs, five monkeys, ...)  but seldom the list and less seldom does it repeat (think Old McDonald).  My girls love hearing the list.  They count on it.  If I change the order either time it comes up, Caroline will complain about it.  The list is something that helps their memory skills and enthralls them. 
4) It gives the idea that they can ask Jesus for help, and hopefully their parents too.